Tom Brady’s Diet Is So Healthy It’s Sickening

For those who have a physique like Tom Brady’s, the following is not news to you. For the rest of us mortals who play Tom Brady on XBox and eat Cheetos from the couch, get a load of this!

In an interview with Boston.com, Allen Campbell – personal chef to Brady and his supermodel wife, Gisele – spills the beans on the couple’s super serious diet.

Campbell says that 80% of what they eat “is vegetables…and whole grains: brown rice, quinoa, millet, beans.” As for the rest? “It’s lean meats: grass-fed organic steak, duck every now and then, and chicken,” he explains. “As for fish, I mostly cook wild salmon.”

And what don’t the Brady’s eat?

“No white sugar. No white flour. No MSG. I’ll use raw olive oil, but I never cook with olive oil. I only cook with coconut oil. Fats like canola oil turn into trans fats ... I use Himalayan pink salt as the sodium. I never use iodized salt.” What else? “No coffee. No caffeine. No fungus. No dairy.”

In addition -- "[Tom] doesn’t eat nightshades, because they’re not anti-inflammatory. So no tomatoes, peppers, mushrooms, or eggplants. Tomatoes trickle in every now and then, but just maybe once a month. I’m very cautious about tomatoes. They cause inflammation."

The guy sounds like the food Nazi, 'NO PEPPERS FOR YOU!!' And all those veggies? You know that means a lot of gas. From both of them. Does farting make Gisele hotter or notter?

And where does one acquire Huimalayan Pink Salt anyway?

The way Brady's been playing the last few weeks, someone should try and slip him a pizza before their eliminated from the NFL Playoffs.